The Problem With “Be Strong” in Continued Sobriety

Navigating dedicated treatment programs and overcoming substance use disorder (SUD) is difficult. Those in recovery will continue to navigate obstacles, hurdles, stress, and more throughout their continued recovery journey, even after they have graduated from a dedicated treatment program. Sobriety is not something that is traditionally “completed,” but rather something that is constantly evolving with changing needs and goals. The emotional trials of recovery are difficult, and it is common to feel as if an individual simply has to “be strong” in the face of adversity. While such dedication to overcoming stress is noble, there can also be dangers and costs associated with adopting this mentality. 

While the thoughts and intentions behind a “just be strong” mentality can have the right goals at heart, they can also be actively detrimental to an individual in some unique ways. Even those who have graduated from a treatment program and are employing personalized coping strategies may still feel some of its adverse effects. Understanding the dangers of this mentality is crucial for both maintaining a healthier emotional state and promoting more effective strategies to address the challenges throughout continued sobriety. 

Practicing vulnerability is crucial throughout recovery and is commonly practiced in dedicated treatment programs. A degree of vulnerability is necessary to effectively and honestly address the emotional needs of those overcoming SUD, as well as develop the most personalized treatment plans possible. The ability to express vulnerability empowers those in recovery to be able to communicate personal challenges, from feelings of anxiety and stress to depression, urges, cravings, and more throughout their recovery, helping each person better work alongside supports to address and overcome these challenges. 

Adopting a consistent “be strong” mentality can seem at odds with a person’s need to identify and express vulnerability throughout the recovery process. Some may begin to push down these feelings in an attempt to put on a strong face, compromising other coping strategies and allowing these feelings to build and birth new stress, anxiety, depression, and more. Avoiding the use of dedicated coping strategies in order to “be strong” can even compromise a person’s overall sober efforts. Likewise, employing this mentality across many situations can cause an individual to avoid established communication channels with supports, friends, and family, further compromising the efficacy of these supportive relationships. 

The idea that a person should just “be strong” or “get over” whatever stresses may manifest also does very little to offer guidance or direction on how to overcome personal stresses. For some, it can imply that such stresses are something that should not even demand a dedicated coping strategy. This not only compromises the use of other recovery strategies but also introduces new challenges if an individual feels that they are somehow “failing” in their recovery by experiencing such stress in the first place. 

Prioritizing a “be strong” mentality can unnecessarily compromise a person’s continued recovery efforts. Additionally, it can even cause an individual to regress to previously destructive mentalities or practices from before they embarked on their recovery journey. However, there are always strategies each person can use to identify these mentalities and ensure that healthy practices are maintained. Here are some suggestions:

Journals are amazing resources throughout recovery. For many, they can be great ways of identifying stresses and legitimizing their feelings. Writing down stresses, challenges, emotions, fears, and more can all be great ways of expressing vulnerabilities and normalizing these practices. Others can look back on these challenges to develop dedicated and practical strategies rather than avoiding addressing such stresses altogether. Having a space to acknowledge these experiences is necessary to legitimize them, challenging the idea that a person should simply “be strong.”

Communication with peers, professionals, and family members is an important skill. Continuing to develop communication strategies can be necessary for challenging these destructive “be strong” mentalities. By making an effort to physically meet with these important supports every day, or reach out via phone call, text message, and more, each individual can best normalize the practice of discussing stresses and challenges without feeling as if they have to overcome such challenges on their own. 

The environment can play a large role in the development of “be strong” mentalities. For some, overly masculine environments or places that stigmatize the expression of emotional needs can birth this perspective in oneself. Continuing to meet with peers and professionals, especially through outpatient treatment programs, can challenge the impact of these environments and instill healthier perspectives of oneself and new mentalities. 

Overcoming addiction and SUD is not just a journey of willpower. Moreover, it is completely normal to continue to face adversity in continued recovery even after graduating from a treatment program and transitioning to outpatient care. Thinking that each individual should simply be able to “get over” whatever stresses may be present can be a wholly unrealistic goal in recovery. Finding a supportive center for alcohol and drug treatment to safely express vulnerability, ask for assistance, and rely on others can serve a great purpose for those continuing to develop their sober lives. 

Just trying to “be strong” in recovery can lead alumni to dangerous and unnecessary risks to their sobriety and transformed lifestyle. At Hawaii Island Recovery, we create a comprehensive center for alcohol adn drug treatment that not just addresses the use of addictive substances, but also instills the most supportive and effective mentalities and practices to sustain such change. Our approach to recovery and sobriety is based on the continued development and addressing all of a person’s needs, from their coping strategies to their social needs and spiritual growth. For more information on how we can help you, or to speak to a caring, trained staff member about the opportunities available with us for your continued success, call (866) 390-5070.