Hawaii Island Recovery 
Communicating needs and goals with the professionals at Hawaii Island Recovery is paramount throughout recovery, empowering each person to make personalized changes to their treatment plan and address specific needs throughout their journey. However, these communication skills are still important even after graduating from a dedicated detox and residential treatment program. Talking with family about these needs after treatment is just as important. Yet, developing these communication skills is equally important when communicating boundaries with family for an effective transition to daily sober life.
The Importance of Communicating Boundaries
Transitioning from a dedicated and curated recovery space like Hawaii Island Recovery back into the “real world” is filled with stress. While families and supports will want to provide all support possible to ensure a person’s healthy and sober transition after their rehab in Hawaii, it is still important to establish boundaries. Respecting personal space and time while developing personal sober lifestyles is paramount to empowering alumni to explore their newfound sober identity and take agency over their routines and success.
Likewise, respecting the boundaries of newly sober alumni is also necessary to develop trust in personal and familial relationships following addiction. Individuals and families may still harbor difficult feelings of distrust, resentment, anxiety, or blame. Communicating and respecting boundaries is necessary to challenge these feelings while engaging in other familial healing efforts.
Effectively Communicating Boundaries With Family
While establishing effective personal boundaries is important, it is equally crucial that these boundaries are clearly communicated to avoid misunderstandings. Ensuring that these boundaries are agreed on while still engaging in ongoing treatment or family healing programs can empower entire families to continue to focus on their own needs and goals while healing from the effects of addiction and substance use.
Establishing a Personal Space
Having a personal space to call one’s own is important among alumni. These spaces can provide a safe, sober space of self-expression or a place to escape the daily stresses of life outside of a sober facility. Continuing to navigate urges as well as interpersonal stress, workplace stresses, and more can be difficult, and having a consistent place to call one’s own can provide a feeling of safety and consistency. Discussing with family this personal space and making it clear that it is a place of privacy can be important for feeling safe in these spaces.
If some families feel it necessary to check on an individual, it is important to establish under what grounds others may enter the space. For some, simply knocking before coming in can be a great method. However, others may want to keep the space completely private. If some family members still want to enter the space to check for addictive substances, even with positive intentions, this can still feel invasive. Having a conversation first to outline the reasons they think such an action is necessary can further open a dialogue without compromising this personal space.
Respecting Time
Boundaries are not always physical spaces. Rather, some may want to establish boundaries around certain times of day for various reasons. For some, this can be blocking off an hour in the afternoon to watch a favorite television program, or wanting to start the day undisturbed throughout their morning routine.
Creating a calendar or timesheet in a public space can help remind family members of these times, while also empowering family members to set aside time for their self-care efforts. These boundaries around time can facilitate truly familial healing after addiction, ensuring alumni are utilizing different supports at different times and empowering each person to still tend to personal needs.
Communicating Boundaries to Embrace Accountability
Establishing boundaries as an alumnus comes with a feeling of peace and respect, but also with responsibility. An individual will still be accountable for their actions in sobriety. These personal spaces can be freeing, empowering alumni to explore new hobbies and interests while truly making a space their own. However, each alumnus will still have their responsibilities to tend to, as well as their commitment to sobriety and trust. Keeping the space clean and devoid of addictive substances is just the beginning. The freedoms allowed by communicating boundaries can still be compromised if an individual is found accountable for slips or relapses throughout their recovery journey.
Reinforcing Change
It can be difficult for both sober alumni and their families to embrace effective boundaries. While family members may want to ensure that a sober loved one is continuing to focus on their healing and sobriety, sober alumni will also have to adapt to times when they may not have particular support from individuals as they respect their family members’ boundaries. These boundaries are crucial for healing and developing healthy relationships.
Working to set alternative sources of support, or establishing various forms of contact, can empower families to respect each other’s boundaries without compromising each others’ privacy and respect. For example, an individual may not want to be disturbed during a particular self-care activity, but sending an e-mail without the need for an urgent response can still be acceptable, depending on how families communicate boundaries and expectations.
Boundaries are important to establish for both alumni graduating from their rehab in Hawaii to their family members continuing to live their own lives. At Hawaii Island Recovery, we understand the importance of not just establishing a personal space but also effectively communicating its importance, boundaries, and more for a sustainable healthy life. Our unique approach to change empowers each person in recovery to be the agent of their own success, with effectively maintaining these boundaries and personal spaces being a part of that journey into agency and self-fulfillment. We are also prepared to work with you to empower you to fill these spaces with new therapeutic outlets, self-care, and more. For more information, call (866) 390-5070.