Has Addiction Hurt Your Family? 10 Questions to Ask
Addicts don’t just hurt themselves with destructive behaviors and substance abuse, addicts hurt co-workers, they hurt neighbors and friends, and saddest, perhaps, addicts hurt their loved ones – their families.
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Has Addiction Hurt Your Family?
Has an addiction – your addiction hurt your family? Ask yourself some questions and be truthful in looking for answers.
1. Have you ever lied about your addiction to a family member?
Telling a lie is wrong. Telling a lie to your spouse, your kids, or parents is very wrong.
If you’ve ever lied about your substance abuse challenges you’ve harmed important relationships in life – relationships based on trust and honesty.
2. Do you abuse drugs or alcohol around your kids?
Kids learn behavior from those around them. Parents are critical socializing forces shaping the character of the next generation.
Unfortunately, your substance abuse problem may get passed down to the next generation – your kids who watch you, emulate you and want to be like you.
3. Have you ever called in sick to work with the “gin flu?”
Absenteeism in the workplace hurts the business. It hurts you, too.
If you work for an hourly wage, you lost money by not going to work. If you’re salaried, management will quickly notice that you have Monday Morning flu frequently.
4. Have you ever been passed over for a promotion or raise at work?
You may think you’re fooling the world but, over time, evidence of an addiction emerges.
You miss deadlines. You’re caught “cat-napping” after a three-martini lunch. Your sales numbers are the lowest in the department.
Ever wonder why…
…you didn’t get that promotion at work?
Chances are, management considered you for the promotion or raise but your substance abuse problem got in the way. As a result, you’ve hurt family members who would’ve enjoyed a better quality of life.
5. Have you ever spent household expense money to support your addiction?
This one is a no-brainer, and most addicts have used the rent money to support an addiction.
Don’t think that hurts your family? Think again.
6. Have you ever driven while impaired – with family in the car?
Driving drunk, or buzzed, puts you at a much higher risk for an accident, with your family in the car.
You jeopardize the health of your entire family when you chauffeur them around while drunk, stoned or otherwise buzzed. Innocent victims.
7. Have you ever “stolen” from family to support an addiction?
The antiques are in the pawn shop because you needed cash to support your addiction.
You’ve hurt yourself, and you’ve hurt the ones you love and who love you.
8. Have you ever argued with family about your addiction?
If your loved ones are telling you there’s a problem, but you push back and deny the problem, it’s never going to be fixed.
Addiction undermines the trust we have in loved ones, and the trust they have in us. Once trust is lost, it’s very difficult to recover.
9. Have family members asked you to get help with your addiction?
That’s when denial pops up, the defenses are put in place, and phony righteous indignation is all you have.
If family members tell you there’s a substance abuse problem, and it belongs to you, believe them. They aren’t asking you to seek help to make you feel bad. They’re asking you to seek help to heal their family.
10. Has your circle of friends gotten smaller – much smaller?
People don’t want to be around addicts so addicts tend to hang with other addicts, re-enforcing self-destructive behaviors.
Back then you had lots of friends. If all your friends are substance abusers like you, then you don’t really have friends.
Time to Face Your Addiction
You know you have a substance abuse problem, though it’s something you try not to think about.
You know life would be better without addictive behaviors, or substance abuse. Life would be better for the entire family. An addiction hurts more than just the addict. An addiction is toxic, undoing families, life-long friendships, productive synergies with co-workers, and putting in danger the people you see daily driving the streets buzzing. Time to make it right.
Evidence-based therapies deliver a customized approach employing traditional and leading-edge therapies to address substance abuse and destructive behaviors.
Nothing will get better for you or your family until you take the first step. Contact the professionals at Hawaii Island Recovery. Talk to one of our knowledgeable, compassionate therapists, and discover how to recover in paradise.